Opinion: How a smartphone became the thief of my joy

The summer before my senior year of high school, I was feeling miserable. Life had begun to feel like a drag. Hobbies, friends, work, extracurriculars, they just didn’t provide joy like they had in the past. I looked everywhere for someplace to put the blame for my newfound dissatisfaction. Did I need to choose a new sport; maybe even find new friends? I slowly spiraled down until it seemed there was no answer. I had decided that this was simply the way that I was doomed to live.
It wasn’t until a family camping trip that I discovered the real culprit: something small and virtually unstoppable, a subtle killer. The enemy of the happiness that I had been looking for was in my back pocket.
My family returned home on a night that my friends and I had planned a party. We had a dress code, special decorations and games. It was sure to be an excellent time. I arrived home a few hours before the party. Feeling tired, I went to my bedroom in the basement and decided I needed to relax a little before going to the party. So after almost four days of not having my phone, I connected to the Wi-Fi, typed in my passcode and began to scroll. I clicked into every app on my phone, catching up on the feed that I had missed, aimlessly meandering through the endless content the algorithms put in front of me. I was numb, unaware and unfeeling. Slowly, the time ticked away, until it was far past the time I needed to leave for the party. Deciding that it was too late, I turned back to my screen.
But then came a moment that forever changed the way I viewed both technology and myself. Suddenly, I was seeing myself as if from an outside perspective. I found myself staring down at me as I hunched over the screen in hand. My family was upstairs and my friends were off having fun together. What on earth was I doing?
My stomach twisting, I clicked into my settings app and with apprehension navigated to the little hourglass that indicated screen time. When the app loaded and displayed the results, I covered my hand with my mouth, feeling my insides begin to churn.
I spent more time on my phone than I did actually living. I sat there on the floor, completely aghast. There were no words for the horror I felt. My entire summer, I had been blaming everyone else, but here was my problem, laying in my hand. It was the real reason my relationships were strained, the true cause of my unhappiness, the thief of my time.
Since that night, I have spared no effort in battling my phone addiction. I have learned through trial and error that boundaries are a strong guard against mindless scrolling. My phone is not allowed at the dinner table, the bathroom or after 10:00 PM. I try to be aware of when I am using it to hide from social situations. And whenever I pull it out, I ask myself, “What is my purpose?” If I can’t answer that question, I know it should go right back in my back pocket.
This struggle is not unique to me. In fact, it is not unique to one group or age. Smartphone addiction affects every person who carries one. Thirty-eight percent of teenagers admit that they spend too much time on their smartphones, and 48% of parents report the same. Almost half of both groups are unsatisfied with their relationship with smartphones. We often associate the word “addiction” with things like drugs and gambling, but the truth is, the effects of apps like social media have are frighteningly similar. We as families, as nations and as humanity have to face the facts: While smartphones make so much possible, they also have the potential to leave our lives in ruins.
So, what can we do?
Start small by setting up boundaries and taking control. Be aware of the time you spend on your phone — notice when you pick it up and why. How long do you spend on social media, the news or gaming apps? Are you able to put your phone down when a loved one is talking to you? We already gain back so much control when we are intentional with our phone use.
As you notice a change in your life, share with others. Help the people around you pull out of their screen’s grasp. As we work together, we can build up a happier, more productive and safer world.
Make the choice today: Put down your phone, draw yourself away from your screen and find yourself again.
Grace Waite is a lifelong resident of Utah and a full-time student at Salt Lake Community College.